Michael-Ellen (Mikey)

the dream of everyone who looks like me
is to forget dicks exist.
my girlfriend’s ex not-really-bf wears a dangly earring now.
i hate it!!! he’s straight.
and he’s got a dick.
i mean, so do i but it’s the silicone kind you can forget on the stove
for your roommate to find the next morning
(sorry alec).

when i’m working my shift at the coffee shop
i “yeah man” and [grunt] and
wide-leg-tense-arm STOMP my way through my introduction
to twenty-seven new people every hour
and when i drink too much cold brew (black) i have to SHIT in the MEN’S ROOM.

i met him for the first time at the coffee shop, the ex not-really-bf,
and was delighted
bc i thought it was funny to meet him the way i did:
my girlfriend off to the side,
having just kissed me over the milk-streaked counter.
he’s a nice guy, jake,
i’ve just never been on good terms with my dick.

so when i see him again we chat and laugh and i say “what a weird dude i like him”
then later i punch through drywall the way a guy with a dick would.


Michael-Ellen (Mikey) Walden is a junior studying Theatre and Gender and Sexuality Studies. They are from Paducah, KY.